I just finished it
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Do you know someone who needs technology with him at all times? Who is the first in line to buy the latest software, video game, or system? Who stays up all hours of the night trying to figure out the final code? Who doesn’t leave his room for months when he is engaged in a serious technological activity?
If so, do you tell this person that he should “get some air,” or ask him if he is still alive? Regard him as a lazy but intelligent? Try to get him to leave his gear and come join the others on the outside?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, chances are that you have a geek in your life. Over the years, the meaning of the word “geek” has changed. Science has learned, over the years that geeks are our most powerful and intelligent people. A great amount has been learned recent years about the habits and requirements of geeks. Most people know how to identify a geek, but if you do not, you are behind in the times. Geeks are very often misunderstood, unwanted, and made fun of because of their geekis or geek syndrome.
I know. My name is Brandon, and I am a geek.
I have known about it for years, from the day I first discovered the world of technology. I spent hours on my computer, playing games, surfing the internet, and trying to get into every administrator file on every computer, and, most of the time, I succeeded. I admit that I do not have the best social skills, nor do I have the worst. I often have long conversations about the melting and freezing points of various substances, something that many people would not find very interesting. I have identified myself to my friends as a geek. Now I am here to explain how to care for your geek. Remember, you will come across a geek almost every day of your life.
What is “The Geek Syndrome”?
The word “geek” first appeared in the time of carnivals, where there was no technology. It was defined as: a carnival performer often billed as a wild man, whose act usually included biting the head off a live chicken or snake. Unfortunately, I have never been known as a wild man and, similarly, known to bite the head off a live animal, so this definition is incorrect. Wrestler Freddie Blassie popularized the slogan “pencil-neck geek” in 1953, which he later turned into a song. This song is a bridge between the ancient definition of geek (a circus freak) and a more current definition of geek (a social outcast who deserves to be harassed). I’m not saying that you should throw eggs at me as I walk down the street (please don’t), because this definition is not true either. A geek, despite what abstract people think, is a person who loves technology.
Jocks are people who enjoy sports and such, and do not need technology to live their lives. Most jocks go through the day with only a cell phone, something a geek would never truly want to do. The science of television and the internet has proven that Jocks have a low intelligence. They can stand to be without technology, but in contrast, geeks cannot. After twenty minutes our hands start sweating from lack of keyboard typing and when it gets even worse, we can go crazy (of course this does not mean we will bite the head off a live chicken, but you get the point). As geeks we need to have some sort of technology on us; we need to have the internet, a cell phone, and/or a laptop. The more technology we have, the happier we will be. It’s not that we don’t like spending time with our friends; it’s just that we do not like to do it in person. I don’t want to see you, but I’d be glad to talk to you over the internet.
How many people are geeks?
It truly was hard to find this answer. At first, it looked as if Google had failed me. I sat horrified, staring at the screen and looking for the stats, but then, I found it. Livesceince.com states that approximately forty percent of people between the ages of 18 and 45 are "intellectually curious" about politics, the arts and science, all spending significant time with newspapers, related television channels and online media. In other words, 40 percent of the adult population has the geek syndrome. These stats were extremely hard to find because some people do not want to be identified as geeks or nerds.
Are geeks misunderstood?
Astronomically. Geeks don’t always dress badly; they are not anti-social people, but they are extremely shy. Instead of going on a date with a cute girl, a geek would rather sit home on his computer and gaze at the latest source code. Many people do not see the advantage to “surfing the web” or thinking computers. In fact, a super geek named Robert Hayden invented a language, a geek code (I’m not making this up). Using this code geeks can talk to one another, explain what they like, dislike, their personalities, and other things. For example, the code: W+++ means: “I am a Webmaster,” while W--- means: “What’s this internet I’m hearing about?”
Are geeks oppressed?
I would say so. For one thing, many geeks have been mentally harmed by their peers in the younger part of their life. Because of this, some geeks have begun to hide themselves from civilized society, staying inside, with only the technological devices for outside interaction. Geeks are hard to bring out into the open when they are without their devices, but they truly shine over the internet, helping people with various computer and internet problems.
Geeks therefore dominate cyberspace, and the life that dominates within it. Geeks are not made for politics. It would ruin the world if geeks began to run the politics. Every day there would be a new way to run things, a new idea, a new way of life.
Whereas jocks are seen as sporty, meatheaded, and square, geeks are described with the words including but are not limited to: trekkie, techhead, foolish, inept, or unattractive person.
Are geeks arrogant?
Fairly. Many people do not see our arrogance, however, because of our lack to point it out to the general public. Of course we are truly proud of the great work that we do and occasionally we will pronounce it, in the form of a mass email. Geeks achieve great work, but it is only truly great with something we want to do. Give us a soccer ball and we will kick it, get board, and go find some other means of entertainment; give us an old electronic device (such as a gameboy) and we will strip it, define it, and re-engineer it into something better. Recently Benjamin Heckendorn (benheck.com) redesigned his xbox 360 into a laptop, a feat that is extremely hard to do to the average geek. Even if you have not seen a geek’s arrogance, you eventually will. It will be the geek who gets that office promotion instead of you, who creates the better piece of work, who obliterates you as competition.
The best of it is that jocks do not have the best life. Contrary to what most think, geeks do have a better life. Geeks make the most money (I’m not making this up), have the most intellectual and non-physical jobs and can even think before their actions. Still we endure the pain and suffering that jocks bring us and our advanced civilization. Hopefully, in the near future, we can dream of a world where geeks will dominate the world (I laugh like an evil genius as I type this), and it will not be impolite to respond to the various accusations by saying “I’m a geek. I am a wonderful, intelligent, and an all around better person than you are. But you’re still great.”
How can I let the geek in my life know that I support him and respect his choice?
First, understand that a geek needs access to technology at all times. This could mean keeping a gameboy near the bed, or even in the bathroom.
Second, when you go to criticize a geek, don’t. We do not care what you think (well those of us who have recognized ourselves as a geek).
Third, don’t communicate with us in any way (this includes but is not limited to: touching, seeing, hearing, and thinking), unless it is over the internet.
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DO NOT RIP!!! - or santos will eat your brains!
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